{"id":682,"date":"2009-05-08T07:45:25","date_gmt":"2009-05-08T12:45:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/?p=682"},"modified":"2018-11-08T23:31:40","modified_gmt":"2018-11-09T03:31:40","slug":"spitfires-vs-battallion-game-5-trash-talk-dept","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/2009\/05\/08\/spitfires-vs-battallion-game-5-trash-talk-dept\/","title":{"rendered":"Spitfires vs Battallion:  Game 5 Trash Talk Dept."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Game five of the OHL Championship series goes tonight at the WFCU Centre in Windsor, 7:05 p.m.\u00a0 I fully expect Spits fans to absolutely blow the roof off the new rink tonight when the Spits take the ice, and the team is going to come out charged up and ready to roll.\u00a0 I am very much hoping, <a title=\"Why the Spitfires Need to Win the Memorial Cup\" href=\"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/2009\/03\/13\/go-spits-go-why-windsor-needs-a-memorial-cup-champ\/\" target=\"_blank\">as I have written elsewhere<\/a>, that the Spits to book their ticket to Rimouski tonight.\u00a0 I am still charged up from <a title=\"My Game 4 Summary\" href=\"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/2009\/05\/07\/windsor-spitfires-at-bramptonbattalion-game-4-recap\/\" target=\"_blank\">watching the Spits beat the Battalion 4-1 the other night<\/a> in Brampton.<\/p>\n<p>The other thing that emerged from my visit to Brampton&#8217;s Powerade Centre:\u00a0 the following list of seven reasons that the Brampton Battalion should NOT win the OHL Championship.<\/p>\n<p>(1) The team colours; guys:\u00a0 it&#8217;s called olive &#8220;drab&#8221; for a <em>reason<\/em>.<\/p>\n<div style=\"width: 510px\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><a title=\"sarge by warwalker_2000, on Flickr\" href=\"http:\/\/www.flickr.com\/photos\/warwalker\/3511252653\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/farm4.static.flickr.com\/3323\/3511252653_a27c32f7f2.jpg\" alt=\"sarge\" width=\"500\" height=\"375\" \/><\/a><p class=\"wp-caption-text\">Sarge scares some kids (from www.spitfire-hockey.com)<\/p><\/div>\n<p>(2)\u00a0 The Brampton players emerge from their dressing room and enter the ice surface at the start of the game through a giant inflatable tank.\u00a0 First, nothing says &#8220;invincible&#8221; like a giant air-filled pillow;\u00a0 and second, the &#8220;muzzle&#8221; of the tank droops rather obscenely.\u00a0 When we first saw it, my Dad expressed some degree of concern that they might use the damn thing to fire t-shirts or other swag into the crowd (a la the t-shirt bazookas in use at other facilities).\u00a0 He was right to be concerned.\u00a0 These guys really carry the military theme a touch over the top.<\/p>\n<p>(3)\u00a0 They have a freaky looking mascot called &#8220;Sarge&#8221;.\u00a0 And I mean <em>freaky, <\/em>this thing is some kind of messed up.\u00a0 If a real live person were dressed in olive drab combat fatigues but had an oversized head that looked like one of those weird apple core dolls, that person would:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>scare the shit out of me; and<\/li>\n<li>look exactly like &#8220;Sarge.&#8221;<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I think this mascot decision of the Battalion&#8217;s is very curious;\u00a0 whereas teams like the Calgary Flames have &#8220;Harvey the Hound&#8221; (an oversized, furry and friendly mutt),\u00a0 the Brampton Battalion have chosen to attempt to endear themselves to the children by circulating among them a perpetually scowling drill sergeant with an alarming complexion and a warlike demeanour.\u00a0 Not the choice I would have predicted.<\/p>\n<p>(4)\u00a0 For about two or three minutes prior to the beginning of each period, arena staff play a recording of some sort of cannon firing over the facility&#8217;s loudspeakers.\u00a0\u00a0 What a way to create a festive environment!\u00a0 What better way to evoke the carefree abandon of New Orleans at Mardi Gras or the joyful ebullience of the old Chicago Stadium: mimic the ambience of a warzone.\u00a0 I know I never quite feel like partying until the artillery bombardment has begun.<\/p>\n<p>Trending: <a href=\"https:\/\/teamvstime.com\/location\/chicago\/ \">Team vs Time &#8211; Premier Room Escape Chicago<\/a><\/p>\n<p>(5)\u00a0 They refer to the Battalion players as &#8220;troops.&#8221;\u00a0 &#8216;Nuff said.<\/p>\n<p>(6)\u00a0 In the first intermission, &#8220;Sarge&#8221; (see above) skated around the ice and infrequently lobbed t-shirts over the glass to terrified children who reflexively returned his salute.\u00a0 His musical accompaniment, broadcast over the arena public address system, was\u00a0 the music from &#8220;The Great Escape.&#8221;\u00a0 A lone male in an olive drab costume slowly circling the ice, waving his arms to the music from a film about P.O.W.s &#8211; to me, it very much looked like the worst idea for the men&#8217;s short program ever conceived.<\/p>\n<p>(7)\u00a0 At the end of each period, when there are but sixty seconds to play, the arena announcer bellows out &#8220;One minute to ceasefire!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>Really?\u00a0\u00a0 Dude, the military motif?\u00a0 It&#8217;s too much.\u00a0 Seriously.\u00a0 Oh, and Dude?\u00a0 ONE GAME &#8216;TIL CEASEFIRE!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Game five of the OHL Championship series goes tonight at the WFCU Centre in Windsor, 7:05 p.m. I fully expect Spits fans to absolutely blow the roof off the new rink tonight when the Spits take the ice, and the team is going to come out charged up and ready to roll. I am very [&#8230;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[701,50,139,138],"tags":[717,719,1192,721,720,722,1191],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/682"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=682"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/682\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1736,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/682\/revisions\/1736"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=682"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=682"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=682"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}