{"id":77,"date":"2008-01-22T14:46:59","date_gmt":"2008-01-22T18:46:59","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/2008\/01\/22\/breaking-news-alert-juniorvania-found\/"},"modified":"2008-01-22T16:26:46","modified_gmt":"2008-01-22T20:26:46","slug":"breaking-news-alert-juniorvania-found","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/2008\/01\/22\/breaking-news-alert-juniorvania-found\/","title":{"rendered":"Breaking News Alert: Juniorvania Found"},"content":{"rendered":"

Remember that thing I posted<\/a> about having found the property that satisfied the Known Requirements and Specifications for the Kingdom of Juniorvania? And remember how there were certain conditions and contingencies, some of which lay beyond our control, that would determine whether the Kingdom would be claimed?<\/p>\n

In a word: “Done”. <\/p>\n

The Kingdom is ours; at least, that is that an agreement has been struck by which the sellers have agreed to do the thing that sellers do best – selling – and we have secured the right to be the purchasers.<\/p>\n

The mind of a benevolent ruler boggles at moments like this; so many things to do and such little time. Here’s a short (far from complete, just off the top of my head) list of the things Spouse and I will need to accomplish prior to the March 14th closing:<\/p>\n

  • Design and produce Flag of the Kingdom (I am thinking something with a Viking, a snake and some badass lightning bolts would be nice – stylistically reminiscent of 1970s van art<\/a>, of course);<\/li>\n
  • Assemble Army, Navy and Air Force. As the boundaries are somewhat land-locked, “Navy” may be somewhat lower priority than other Juniorvanian defence forces;<\/li>\n
  • Compose, perform and record suitable National Anthem. Something stirring and patriotic, but not dolorous or ponderous. If composition proves difficult (we should know after ten or fifteen minutes of trying to write) see if that Tchaikovsky fellow is available to do us up a little jingle like he did for the Russians; and<\/li>\n
  • Ruthlessly suppress all dissenters. (I didn’t really want to do this one, but it seems to have been on the list for every other two-bit despot and tyrant in history; who am I to mess with tradition?)<\/li>\n

    All hail the Great Kingdom of Juniorvania!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Remember that thing I posted about having found the property that satisfied the Known Requirements and Specifications for the Kingdom of Juniorvania? And remember how there were certain conditions and contingencies, some of which lay beyond our control, that would determine whether the Kingdom would be claimed?<\/p>\n

    In a word: “Done”. <\/p>\n

    The Kingdom is […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[42],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=77"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/77\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=77"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=77"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/heroesinrehab.ca\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=77"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}