HiR:tb Toots (@warwalker)

Maple Leafs Annual 2009-2010

BUY THIS BOOK, DAMMIT. OR LUKE SCHENN WILL ERASE YOU.

Remember the big secret, the writing project that I was feverishly beavering away at (and – miracle of miracles – actually finishing) a few weeks ago?

Well, it’s not so much a secret anymore.

The good folks at Maple Street Press (previously described in […]

Talkin’ Bout a Revolution, it Sounds Like a Twitter

Will Tweet For Food

There’s a revolution coming, people. Not the “We’d like to sell you some mutual funds by incorporating music that used to be subersive into our otherwise non-threatening and highly establishment-based television ad” kind of revolution. Not the kind that requires a lot of marching with torches, either (which is good, […]

Anton Stralman Traded

Anton Stralman is not now, nor will he ever be, Bobby Orr.

Realistically, Stralman has failed to crack the Leafs lineup over the last two years under either Coach Wilson or Paul Maurice. The Leafs’ defence has been paper thin in this time period. Stralman is not old at 23, but it’s fair to say […]

Artist’s Conception

As you may know, an inventory of the benefits accruing to the Canadiens as a result of their recent makeover is being compiled on an ongoing basis. Contributions to the collection continue to be accepted (leave ’em in the comments below, if’n you feel moved to pitch in).

HiR:tb has obtained exclusive photographic evidence of […]

Breaking News: Habs Announce New Logo

HiR:tb’s sources have provided a first look at the Montreal Canadiens’ expected new logo, effective immediately:

Don't know if they're made in trees, but Habs forwards are uncommonly small.

Message in a Bottle: Project C’est Something Nice Continues…

Ladies and gentlemen, Mirinov’s nose has been at it again. I have not yet updated the Project C’est Something NIce main page, but do yourself a favour and click through to learn the secret truth underlying the Canadiens’ offensive strategy.

Thanks everybody for all your submissions – I think we’ve got to be getting close […]

I Feel Like Sally Struthers…

…only instead of dollars, I’m begging for jokes. Oh, and I’m not trying to feed starving African children, I’m trying to ensure that we take the piss out of Habs fans. This shouldn’t be hard; it’s not like Gainey hasn’t given us material to work with.

Here’s where we’re at: 1/3 of the way there. […]

15 So Far: Project “C’est Something Nice Continues”

Project “C’est Something Nice” continues, and you folk are starting to get the hang of this; there are some heart-warming sentiments being expressed. Remember, we’re shooting for a hundred burns rays of sunshine to send to our rivals. As of right now, we Leaf fans have been able to identify 15 positive things to say […]

Project “C’est Something Nice”: Talking to Habs Fans

There has been much joy and mirth not only in these virtual parts but also elsewhere in the Barilkosphere of late. Brian Burke’s succesful efforts to assemble a Brobdingnagian blueline and to complement it with a Colossus in the crease have been largely responsible for the festive atmosphere in Leafdom.

But it has to be […]

Monster’s Inked: Jonas Gustavsson is a Maple Leaf

Citizens of Monstropolis Hope Gustavsson Doesn't Wear Number 2319

Last night, I painted a metaphorical picture of Maple Leafs’ defenceman Francois “Happy Trails” Beauchemin and his bulky blueline brethren as each being rather like a rampaging Godzilla, treating the opposition like so many unfortunate stomped-upon movie extras. Today, Brian Burke brought us a real […]