HiR:tb Toots (@warwalker)

Message in a Bottle: Project C’est Something Nice Continues…

Ladies and gentlemen, Mirinov’s nose has been at it again. I have not yet updated the Project C’est Something NIce main page, but do yourself a favour and click through to learn the secret truth underlying the Canadiens’ offensive strategy.

Thanks everybody for all your submissions – I think we’ve got to be getting close […]

I Feel Like Sally Struthers…

…only instead of dollars, I’m begging for jokes. Oh, and I’m not trying to feed starving African children, I’m trying to ensure that we take the piss out of Habs fans. This shouldn’t be hard; it’s not like Gainey hasn’t given us material to work with.

Here’s where we’re at: 1/3 of the way there. […]

15 So Far: Project “C’est Something Nice Continues”

Project “C’est Something Nice” continues, and you folk are starting to get the hang of this; there are some heart-warming sentiments being expressed. Remember, we’re shooting for a hundred burns rays of sunshine to send to our rivals. As of right now, we Leaf fans have been able to identify 15 positive things to say […]

Project “C’est Something Nice”: Talking to Habs Fans

There has been much joy and mirth not only in these virtual parts but also elsewhere in the Barilkosphere of late. Brian Burke’s succesful efforts to assemble a Brobdingnagian blueline and to complement it with a Colossus in the crease have been largely responsible for the festive atmosphere in Leafdom.

But it has to be […]

Passive Aggressive Sign Language

Rona, as it used to was.

Not far from the friendly confines of Juniorvania, there used to be a Rona store. Careful and attentive readers may remember this store making a cameo appearance in a home improvement saga related to the making of shelves from last year. I think I went in to that […]

Class Act Cervidae

In an effort to pay the bills around here, Heroes in Rehab: the blog has decided to run the occasional advertisement. Management has resolved to ensure that the commercial content is tasteful, minimally intrusive and discreet. In addition, we are determined to endorse only those products and services that we here at HiR:tb can in […]

Primer for Young Leaf Fans

Chapter One

Look at the men. They are wearing blue and white. Why are the men wearing Blue and White? They are Toronto Maple Leafs hockey players. They are teammates playing a hockey game. They wear blue and white shirts. They wear blue and white pants. The blue and white shirts and pants are called […]

We’re Ready Now, Santa!

Did you know that Santa has some helper elves in Florida? And did you know that Santa’s sun-worshipping assistants are in charge of ensuring that all power yard equipment is properly prepared to celebrate the Yuletide festivities?

It’s true.

On Saturday the 13th, Spouse and I hosted the office Christmas party. What preceded the party, […]

Friday Night Blowout: Old Guy Style

“Snow-mageddon“, the snowstorm of the year, has come and gone as promised. Mother Nature behaved quite civilly, for an old lady throwing a meterological shit fit. ‘Round these parts (he said, hitching his overalls up by the straps with both thumbs) the storm began at a reasonable hour – sometime around 7 or 8 o’clock […]

Maple Leafs Twenty Questions: Funsize Edition

All-time world champion non sequitur (in that, in addition to being unrelated to the topic, it “follows” nothing): My Dad, who seems to be working hard to secure a position as worldwide press agent for HiR:tb, tells me that there’s an army of people out there reading the blog and enjoying what I write. […]